Our Baby with Down Syndrome...ContinuedThe story of our baby with Down Syndrome continues... The Next Time Around
Fast forward to pregnancy number eight. No AFP test this time. I wasn't going to go through that again! At the 16 week ultrasound it was determined we were having a boy. The doc also saw just a little bit of enlargement of the openings in the kidneys. "It could be a sign of Down Syndrome", he informed us. I thought, "Oh no, here we go again." A few weeks later the ultrasound was repeated and everything looked perfectly normal. They told us, often when a baby's bladder gets full the renal openings dilate and that was probably what we saw. Phew, what a relief! Everything went smooth as silk. Finally on August 7th, at 36 weeks, my doctor decided it was time, Sam had not gained any weight in the past week. We chalked it up to my high blood pressure. At 7:00 pm that night the cesarean was started and 15 minutes later our screaming little guy made his debut. Not a thought about having a baby with Down Syndrome this time. Being that he was a bit early he was having trouble staying pink so finally they took him to the NICU, but not before his daddy got a chance to hold him. The News After what seemed like hours of cleaning and stitching and stapling, I was finally taken to the recovery room. There, in a cloud of morphine, I was given the news. My husband suspected Down Syndrome because of the shape of Sam's head and his eyes, the doctor told me, and when they examined him they felt the same. It must have been the morphine, I just shrugged and said, "That's okay!" As long as he was healthy. The first time I saw him I knew! God had given me a baby with DS after all. Why? Was I too happy before when my little girl turned out not to have it? Was it because of my discomfort around kids who are "different"? (I have since come to realize that it does not matter why). I tried, successfully, to come across as positive and cheerful, but what I felt inside was despair. How would I deal with this? How would I cope with having a baby with Down Syndrome? It felt like the end of the world. Remember, I was afraid of those who are not deemed "normal" by society.
Sam spent eleven days in the NICU before we got to bring him home. We really didn't bond much during his stay there. Oh sure, I held him, rocked him, fed him, but being a nurse whose specialty is babies and their moms after delivery I was too busy obsessing about his progress and medications and were they doing things right... (Oh the joys of having a nurse for a patient!) So it wasn't until he came home that I totally and completely fell in love with him! He was the sweetest and best baby I ever had (sorry kids!). He slept through the night from the day we brought him home. He is always so good natured (sure he does have a temper, but it never lasts long), he soon learned how to smile and even roll over. Still, I think I was in denial. I would think, "See he's normal, he rolled over so much earlier than most normal kids even." I decided that he must have the physical features of a baby with down syndrome without the "retardation" (even though I really knew better). I still wonder sometimes though. He is a very clever little guy. Yes, I can see his progress is a bit slower than the others. He is one now and not yet pulling up, or cruising along the furniture yet, but that's okay. I always wished that they didn't grow up quite so fast. Be careful what you wish for...
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